clonecumber | Send Me A Character

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Send Me A Character

And I will tell you my:

First impression
Impression now
Favorite moment
Idea for a story
Unpopular opinion
Favorite relationship
Favorite headcanon

Experimenting with collecting my answers to this ask game over here in the comments, since Tumblr is being...Like That.

countessofbiscuit asked:

For the Character Ask: Besany ♡

First impression : Child me was a major fan of the Ordo/Besany ship but I remember being very annoyed at Besany's main flaw being that she was "too beautiful" and I think it soured me on her actual character a bit, even though I retained some fondness for her take-charge personality. Honestly, I think I liked her primarily as an extension of Ordo's character arc?

Impression now : 501st doesn't exist and I love her, your honor. I love her. I've developed such a better appreciation for her character now; I'm so glad I re-read the series. She's amazingly competent and I love how analytical and self-aware her narrative is (or was, before KT gutted her), but I also appreciate how in over her head she actually is, looking at it from adult eyes, and the way she works to handle herself anyway. Even when she's sick with stress, you really only notice it when you're in her head, and she has an edge to her (her reaction to being shot in a dark alley and facing down an irritated Null ARC in his element is to immediately bare teeth right back; you gotta appreciate it).

Favorite moment : That part where Kal calls her Bes'ika for the first time while we're in Besany's head and Besany's internal narrative goes quiet and sharp immediately. Just that abrupt step back from her emotions and the cool, vaguely amused way she regards him for trying to manipulate her was so fucking amazing. I loved it so much. She calls him to the floor at one point when he's trying this and tells him she knows exactly what he's doing with the heavy implication that he should never try it again. It was such a boss moment that even Kal backed down a bit. That doesn't hold weight in like, any other aspect of their interactions, of course, since everything Besany actually does in the series revolves around Kal (instead of, say, Ordo or Corr or herself), but that was just a hint of what could have been that made Besany such a brilliant character.

Idea for a story: I CHANGED MY MIND. A’den training Besany. Ordo would, but he’s actually not great at training people who don’t have the same baseline as him, and he is summarily banned. The other Nulls stick their noses in for a variety of their own reasons, because of course they do. Goal is Besany bonding with her new family, basically.

Unpopular opinion: (I don’t think this series really has popular opinions, but we’ll work with what we have:) I don't actually think Besany's job was especially dangerous, not the way, say, Jilka's could be. It was one of those things that could theoretically be dangerous, but in practice hardly anything really bad had ever actually happened, and Besany's training was kind of lax and perfunctory in response (the way government-funded training likes to get at the first excuse). Her handling herself in the books was straight-up her, flying by the seat of her pants with her best guesswork and half-gleaned, very out-of-date advice from her shitty, shitty training modules. One of those things was more useful than the other.

(Ordo, finding out about this, horrified, now hiding in the ‘fresher and hissing into his comm: A’den. Can you hear- Yes, I can tell you’re being shot at, this is important, listen. A’den, you train civilians, right...?)

Favorite relationship: To be very boring, Ordo. But like...primarily the version of their relationship that lives in my head? I want them to be friends.

Favorite headcanon: Besany's interactions with Kal in general are nothing more than her reading the room and performing accordingly. From the time she was an injured half-prisoner in his HQ and making grand speeches about the plight of clones all the way through acting the doting daughter in Kyrimorut is Agent Wennen at work.

Edited 2021-12-26 11:04 (UTC)

purgetroopercody asked:

For the character ask game: Mereel

Hello!

First impression : About as charmed as I was supposed to be, I think, while missing a significant chunk of his actual character. Didn't give him much thought besides the surface personality he presented.

Impression now : I'm pretty sure I'd have to re-read the series again to actually get a full depth of understanding about Mereel. Because holy shit does this guy have layers. So much of what seems to be going on with his character is completely blanked out to most of our POV characters, and Ordo is too close to him to really see all of his sides, or pay them any mind. Like being friends with a giant eldritch sea creature for so long your narrative forgets to mention that they are, in fact, a giant eldritch sea creature. Most of what Mereel gets up to happens in the negative spaces, since KT let him be so good at his job that no one ever catches him at it unless explicitly told. Like. Damn. He sees the blind spots characters have and he lives there.

Favorite moment : REALLY HARD TO PICK. But I am going to say it's when Mereel masterminds that whole entire thing with Ko Sai's data, hooks Ordo into it, and the only hint we have of his involvement is when Etain overhears an out-of-context blip of conversation later on where Ordo is falling apart with guilt about something ("something") and Mereel is gently patting his fraying edges back into shape and coaxing him into continuing. The way Mereel talked to Ordo, that told me it was Mereel's plan from the start, and Ordo trusted him enough to go along with it. (I feel like this is a significant part of their dynamic Kal tends to miss, honestly. It wasn't Ordo who initiated manipulating Kal in order to steal his hold-out blaster. Ordo just rolled with it.) Anyway, it was just such a stellar show of how much Mereel actually has going on? And the most obvious one in the series, since they actually own up to this one to Kal (though even then not entirely disclosing the degree of Mereel's involvement). It was brilliant and it was ruthless.

The next runner-up was Mereel being legitimately terrifying when he finds Ko Sai again (that smile that smile that smile yikes yikes yikes), and Mereel getting G'ika, and Mereel uncomfortably avoiding involving himself in Vau and Kal's conversation, and when he :O-ed Etain when Etain managed to get Ko Sai to cough up some things, and pouting when Ko Sai didn't like his lab, and his delight over the idea of babysitting Kad, but that's primarily because Mereel's personality shines through in shards in the bits of a greater whole he carefully cobbled together to fit any given moment, so no matter what scene I pick I feel like I'm leaving out a huge chunk of him. The data sub-plot is the closest I can get to pointing and going Mereel.

Idea for a story : Feral undergrad Mereel, fresh from Kamino with all these science ideas and figuring out there are people out there who will answer his questions. Before he's really learned social skills.

Unpopular opinion : (I don’t think this series really has popular opinions, but we’ll work with what we have:) I feel like there's a lot of wiggle-room in regards to how Mereel handles the Kal situation, and everyone's going to come at it differently? But personally I don't think he's actually as much of a playboy as he lets people think he is. Like, I believe he still is to an extent, and I even think he was for a short time after he got off Kamino because it was a bit addicting, honestly, the immediate validation and Kal's almost-approval, but he burned out and "outgrew" it all pretty fast. It's just easier to let people (read: Kal) think that's where he's at, put on a bit of a show sometimes, because it keeps them off his back while he fixates more and more on Ko Sai and the possibility of an aging cure.

(And because not being a rampant playboy makes him nervous about how he's actually supposed to behave, along with some confusion because he likes sex and clubs and people, but the problem is he only knows how to be a person who likes those things in one narrow sort of way, so he’s also just going through the normal aspect of sorting out his adult identity here. (He’s developmentally barely in his twenties at series start and badly set up for success here; there is no way in hell he has his shit together.) On top of being at the awkward point of still desperately wanting to "win" Kal's attention and that having shaped a significant chunk of his personality for years while also getting enough distance from Kal to start cluing in about some uncomfortable things. "but Kal would be so disappointed" is a constant anxiety for him, and going back and forth on how he feels about that thought, from "I don't care"/"Nevermind I care a lot actually" ...repeat ad infinitum. I feel like we sort of see him start to stabilize and settle into himself as the series goes on, though.)

Favorite relationship : Ordo! I have...a lot of feelings about these two, honestly. Corr is a very close runner-up, though.

Favorite headcanon : His relationship with Gaib and TK-0 is actually a genuine friendship but both organic individuals treat it like that one meme where they're staring each other down across the table with awkward discomfort and vague disgust because they have...feelings...about the other person. ("The feeling is friendship, but neither of them had ever experienced it before.") Neither of them will ever admit this on pain of death. They are business associates.

TK-0 read somewhere that you needed to make sure your organic had plenty of socialization opportunities with other organics or they'd get, like, sad or something. He's satisfied with this arrangement.

Anonymous asked:

For the character ask game: Captain Maze. ~ZangZip

First impression : Not too different from my current impression, I feel? It was a long time ago, but I remember really liking Maze and thinking Ordo was too mean to him. I think I was disappointed they didn’t interact more.

Impression now : Mostly just a deeper, more nuanced appreciation for him as a character and his position, and a little more good-natured amusement over his tendency to take everything too seriously.

Also now I think his🎵 LOATHING. UNADULTERATED LOATHING.🎵 (their theme song) relationship with Ordo is the most hilarious thing. The both of them are forever rolling around on the ground pulling hair and shoving each others’ faces into mud puddles. It’s beautiful. Still think he’s Ordo best friend. Maze realizes this. Ordo does not.

Favorite moment : I really, really, really want to say it’s that scene on Kyrimorut when Kal tries every trick in the book on him and Maze isn’t phased even a little bit, but actually I think it’s the moment in Order 66 when Maze confronts Ordo, casual and almost relaxed, and talks about how he reads, how the other men spend their time (playing sports, watching movies). Putting Ordo on the back foot more thoroughly than he ever has before, and mostly just by reminding Ordo that they - yes, even the line troopers - are individuals. Also saying something about him vs Ordo, that Maze was paying enough attention to them to notice, especially since we’ve seen him interact with the commandos and know he’s not exactly friendly even when Ordo isn’t around and getting his back up. It’s one of those moments that really highlights sides of Maze’s character we just aren’t permitted to see, and that’s the point. Him saying, “We all still exist when you’re not here. We have lives.”

We already know Maze is 100% willing to go toe-to-toe with Ordo, Kal, and the Force itself, probably, even when it does get him knocked on his ass, if he perceives the need. This just builds on him as a person so that when we get to the line, “I’m not one of your poor victim clones,” it really hits because neither he nor any of his men were on Kal’s agenda and he knows why.

Idea for a story : I want him to join forces with Besany and Niner. Stress ulcer-having members of this shitshow, unite! I’m attached to the idea of Maze being part of a book club, and him maybe falling in with these guys on the anonymity of the holonet or something. I just also think they’d all make a terrifying group of friends.

Unpopular opinion : (I don’t think this series really has popular opinions, but we’ll work with what we have:) I don’t ship him with Zey. I don’t mind the ship, or watching other people ship it, but it just does not work in my head.

Favorite relationship : ...Ehhhh, probably Zey? There’s just a lot unsaid there that’s kind of interesting, even if I’m not super invested in exploring it myself. Also Maze and finally getting to meet up with any of the other Alpha ARCs. Maze has been cut off from his buddies for too long.

Favorite headcanon : That book club one. Thanks, fandom.

Anonymous asked:

For the character ask game: Fi

First impression : Clown. Sad. Sniper and medic, which I thought was a pretty nifty skillset.

Impression now : Fi’s a bit like Mereel, in that trying to talk about him is very difficult for me to do concisely. Not even Fi seems fully aware of Fi’s depths, but I really appreciate how utterly fucking complicated he is, and primarily that complication mostly only comes about because Fi seems to really like subverting tropes common to his type of character. He’s funny and friendly, but one of the more callous members of Omega when it comes down to it. He acts laid back and a bit ditzy, but he has problems when he’s not in control of his environment and is sharp as a tack, which is easy to miss because Fi doesn’t seem aware of how smart he is, either. His coping mechanisms are avoidance and shoving his feelings into boxes to deal with maybe never, and he’s one of the ones most likely to pick a fight right behind Atin. He’s incredibly loyal, though, and for all his ability to puzzle out just about anything in the galaxy given enough time, he has a blind spot in regards to people he loves, and tends to forgo objectivity altogether when it comes to them. They’re Good and Right and Fi will fight you in this street if you imply otherwise. Very ride or die. His “love language” (as good a term as any) seems to be acts of service, so on top of Fi’s tendency to all-or-nothing devotion, he seems like he will do just about anything for people who love him. ~~(Even when it’s maybe not good for him.)~~

Favorite moment : There are a thousand and one I could pick, honestly, but I’m gonna say it’s that one in Triple Zero where it turns out the plan they were running most of the op was Fi’s. He’s the one who figured out the Separatists would have needed another supplier, and came up with the idea to bait them with Ordo’s cache. It’s really clever, for many, many reasons I can’t quite get into without running this way too long, but the reason I point to it is because while Fi’s particular knack for inferring new information from past experiences comes up a lot, I think it’s about the only time in the series Fi’s brain is really noted. He even managed to surprise Skirata.

Idea for a story : Fi doesn’t actually tend to pop up in the stories I tell myself, weirdly enough? Let’s see. Niner’s spinal injury isn’t so easily healed, or he manages to re-injure it and it can’t be fully healed again. They get him to Mandalore and not a hospital, in-keeping with canon, and Fi tends to chase everyone else off if they make a single proprietary or pitying remark about Niner’s injury and subsequently becomes primarily responsible with helping Niner during his recovery, up to and including helping him learn to handle a space!wheelchair and maybe eventually walk with a brace. (He’s at least as qualified as Parja was to help him.) (Atin is going to single-handedly make this whole-ass planet space!wheelchair accessible, btw). Corr helps too, which is also his reintroduction with Fi. With them working together, no one gets within a stone’s throw of making weird, manipulative comments about Niner owing anyone anything for his recovery. (Niner and Corr find out about the weird, manipulative comments Fi was subjected to about owing someone ~~Parja~~ something ~~marriage~~ for his recovery and hit the fucking roof.) (No, I will never be over that.)

Unpopular opinion : (I don’t think this series really has popular opinions, but we’ll work with what we have:) Uhhhh. UHHHHHH. I don’t know if not liking the Fi/Parja ship would count as unpopular or not? I don’t even really like them as a “beard” relationship, the way I’ve seen it done. I like Parja okay, just...not that relationship.

Favorite relationship : Niner. Hear me out. Niner’s like an anxious sheep dog who starts herding anything that moves when stressed, and Fi keeps good-naturedly letting Niner herd him in circles around the yard into infinity, while feeling genuinely reassured that Niner cares enough to fuss at him. It’s a cute-ass dynamic, for all that I generally can’t stand relationships where one person uses another like a stress ball. It’s so blatantly harmless in the books though, that I eventually relaxed and started thinking it was cute instead, not least because Niner has canonically tucked a fifty-year-old man into bed without so much as a by-your-leave, so I don’t doubt for a second he’s fussed at his squad similarly, nor do I doubt that Fi loves it. I just feel like there’s a lot of opportunities there for Fi, who is a black hole for affection and validation but also expresses affection through, as stated, acts of service, and Niner, who needs to take care of people but does best when someone’s taking care of him right back, to genuinely be good for each other, and I wish it had been explored more in the books.

Favorite headcanon : UHHHH. Oh, right, Fi’s 100% gay, sorry. Forgot that wasn’t canon for a second.

Anonymous asked:

For the ask meme: A'den or Komr'k. Do they even have characters or personality? Who are they KT?

I am going to do them both. Because I love them. Thank you, anon!

(kinda wondering why you gave me characters you don’t think have personalities though?)

A’DEN

First impression : Mountain man. Rugged. Gonna get those sun wrinkles. Kind of an asshole, but like, I forgave him.

Impression now : This is a man who has a lot of feelings and is absolute crap about not wearing them right on his sleeve with his whole-ass heart. Does not have a dissembling bone in his body, and no, looking at his siblings, I have no idea how that happened. Neither do they. It baffles them every day.

Definitely a rugged outdoorsman, but an extroverty outdoorsman. The kind of guy who likes camping because he thinks it’s a fun family activity, and he loves nothing more than to have a nice big crowd around his fire, to bicker about pitching tents and compete over who can catch the biggest fish and just generally really likes roaming around the wilderness with his favorite people. Wouldn’t enjoy it half so much if he were by himself. The kind of guy who seems like he should be a rugged lone wolf, but actually has best friends literally all over the galaxy and knows all their birthdays. Will probably nag you about being too skinny while heaping your plate with third helpings.

Favorite moment : I made a whole post about him trying to make friends with Atin and I hold to that.

Idea for a story : A’den decides the clan needs to hold on to Levet because otherwise this whole-ass farm thing will fall down around their ears, and Levet doesn’t really have significant emotional impetus to hang around if a better offer comes along, probably. So he decides, entirely on his own, that he is going to go provide that emotional impetus. He is going to befriend Levet with ulterior motives for the good of the clan. He is very proud of himself for this decision, and gets right on that. (Back in Kyrimorut, his brothers clue in sooner rather than later, but it’s too late. Jaing probably wakes up in a cold sweat with his A’den is trying to be emotionally manipulative again bells ringing and just knows.)

Anyway, Levet catches a clue pretty quickly but A’den’s handy around the crops and kind of sweet, so it’s whatever. It’d be rude to call him out. A’den, predictably, falls head over heels within, like, a week.

They get married, probably, which means A’den did technically succeed at his mission.

Unpopular opinion : uhhh, I feel like my take on him might not be very popular in general

Favorite relationship : Ny! Their friendship is cute, even though A’den flat-out admits the entire reason he approached Ny was because he thought he could use her since she was a notable soft touch (and I appreciated that A’den was so matter-of-fact about talking about that in front of Ny because any time the Nulls’ socialization is just a few steps left of typical is fun to me). Him supporting her with his hands on her shoulders while she had a really uncomfortable scene with Kal is also one of those that just stuck.

Also the fact that A’den’s attempt to recruit an unknowing minion for The Cause turned into him wanting Ny to be his mom. Which is where the idea that A’den is terrible at keeping any sort of emotional distance whatsover from anything or anyone came from. He is a horrible choice for anything requiring compartmentalization. It’s amazing.

Favorite headcanon : A’den is also very, very gay. Is about as aware of this as he is his own personal failings as a grifter, probably.

KOM’RK

(doing these back-to-back was a mistake I am fatigued. this one’s gonna be a bit lackluster I’m sorry I had it all planned out last night I swear)

First impression : Knife Boi. Quiet.

Impression now : Extremely high emotional intelligence, but honestly that just makes him more alarming, because I don’t feel like he has a very high sense of compassion outside his family, though he can fake it. The rare breed of a low energy extrovert, and probably can pull off the lounging broodingly in a corner thing when he goes to clubs, which probably pisses Mereel off. Very reliable, even to the point where Ordo turns to him for advice a couple times and even accepts Kom’rk chiding him when he puts his foot in it about other people, but whether or not that reliability is a trap door depends on his relationship to the person, and it is genuinely impossible to tell the difference in how he treats someone he genuinely cares about and how he treats a mark until he actively decides to drop the act. Basically on the opposite end of the spectrum from A’den. I’m pulling that entirely from the way he treats Jusik, which I will get to.

But he also loves his brothers and he does things like hole up in Jaing’s room and take over a corner for himself, presumably because he just doesn’t like being alone, which is fucking cute.

Favorite moment : When Jusik, failing to note the irony, asks Kom’rk to kill him if he ever decides Jusik is getting too comfortable with manipulating other people or subverting their free thinking, and Kom’rk - who is definitely not unaware of the irony - immediately goes, “Yeah, sure, bro. Will do.” One...that’s fucking cold for someone who’s been characterized up until this point as the reliable, level-headed one who was considerate of other peoples’ feelings, wow. Talk about turning on a dime. Two, even Jaing gets a bit nervous at Kom’rk’s easy answer, and I feel like that says a hell of a lot about how Kom’rk operates.

And probably how he feels about Jusik, without ever giving the actual empath a reason to doubt Kom’rk’s loyalty to his new brother that I’m not actually sure Kom’rk feels. Good luck telling that from his behavior, though.

Idea for a story : Kom’rk developing an actual emotional investment in this clan that isn’t just his brothers. (I vote Laseema.)

Unpopular opinion : are there opinions?

Favorite relationship : Jaing. A very interesting take on the those two guys concept that I adore. I also like the idea that Jaing “People Gloves” Skirata, was probably the one who followed Kom’rk “nobody got me a cake /jk /kinda not really” Skirata to the Outer Rim to provide emotional support for him while he self-isolated. Their dynamic is bloody and sweet, I think.

Favorite headcanon : Kom’rk’s one of the first of the Nulls to really understand how badly Kal did by them, and part of his desire to keep his distance is for that reason while he’s trying to sort it out.

kungfuslipper asked:

Vau for the character asks : )

I’m laughing, that’s mean 🤣

Thank you very much <3

WARNINGS because, like...abuse and a rambling attempt to articulate a difficult concept?

First impression : BAD (but slightly uncomfortable because I was still a kid and didn’t like hastily shoving people into black-and-white boxes, and I was already very used to making excuses for likable abusers, so).

Impression now : *adult me, significantly more comfortable jamming people into boxes*: VERY BAD

But also, a fascinating and powerful mirror. Vau’s narrative role as Skirata’s mirror, as someone who - again and again - has his damaging behaviors spelled out for him and continues refusing to actually own up to them or better himself in any way, and how he gets away with it because he manages to be charming, is actually kind of amazing. Literally Vau and Skirata both go through the exact same arc with the exact same beats where they are continuously made to face their abusive actions, even have each other point out the others’ problems, and neither of them ever actually get to the point of admitting the damage they’ve done. They’re both abusers who never actually learn any better, but more than that they’re written deliberately to be as sympathetic as it’s possible for them to be while still routinely showing the damage from the POV of the people they abused to show that this isn’t supposed to make it better or more forgivable, and seeing the differences and similarities in how characters in-universe and people in fandom respond to that is...pretty interesting? Even when KT makes it incredibly obvious that Vau has not actually gotten any better. See as one example: The scene late in the series where he hurts that line trooper while “training” him and makes Scorch feel sick. This is not a man who has learned shit; he just became more comfortable with his excuses, which is a mindset partially reflected in the narrative by Skirata softening his stance on him, even though he’s done nothing to make amends and it’s not Skirata’s place, anyway.

If KT were playing the long game, then her using Vau’s arc and role as the more conventional abuser as a hint to the reader to pay attention to Skirata’s less conventionally obvious abuse and where he was at regarding his awareness of his own shit would have been absolute genius, and Skirata softening on Vau should have been a blaring warning sign than his character arc was about to hit rock bottom, since he’s not supposed to be accepting the unrepentant personification of all his own worst failings. That and Ordo’s increasing impatience with him seems like it should have been heading to some sort of character-significant confrontation.

But the whole thing got knocked over in 501st, so oh well, I guess. ~~(A moment of silence for Atin, please.)~~

Favorite moment : When they rescue Vau from the ice ball and Skirata wants to send Ordo after Etain because...pregnancy hormones or whatever? Who else could possibly go? And Vau goes, “I actually got along quite well with the young woman,” for no other reason than to be a shit, apparently, and Skirata can’t even respond, he just stares at him in unimpressed disgust while Vau makes an innocent face.

...It was funny.

Idea for a story : Vau’s inability to overcome his shitty behavior gets turned on Sev after he’s rescued, and Scorch straight up kills the man in the heat of the moment. RIP Vau.

Unpopular opinion : (I don’t think this series really has popular opinions, but we’ll work with what we have:) where the hecks did Vau’s relationship with Jaing come from that he felt comfortable leaving Mird to him how did that even make sense-

I mean, I love Jaing having a soft spot for Mird, but it came out of total left field-

Favorite relationship : The one he has with Skirata, that I...kind of already rambled about, whoops. They have a fun dynamic otherwise too, though. Sure wish they could have dragged each other out of the muck instead of reinforcing each others’ shit, though, Skirata, over there with your, “Of course he knew you cared,” bullshit after Sev gets lost on Kashyyyk. No, he didn’t, Skirata.

Favorite headcanon : ...Okay, so my story idea is fulfilling multiple roles in this ask game, I guess. It is really carrying this team. ~~(If not Scorch, I have money on Laseema.)~~

purgetroopercody asked:

Levet for the character ask! Love him so much.

I’d like to hear your thoughts on him too, actually. Levet could use so much love. He’s a good one.

First impression :I don’t actually think I had much of an impression about Levet? I remembered him, sort of, but it was more in the sense of being aware he at least existed.

Impression now : The only actual adultier adult in this joint. Still waters run very, very deep with this guy, and he’s interesting because you’d have absolutely no way to know how much is going on in his head if he didn’t sometimes open his mouth and drop absolute game-changers. (RIP Ordo, slaughtered where he stood. He was so young.) Sees everything, says nothing, but has a well of intense emotions deep in the center of himself that’s absolutely fascinating to consider.

Calm, mild, reserved, and terrifyingly sharp, but he also has a strict “not my business” policy that I can respect, especially since he seems to adopt it primarily out of respect for the people whose business it actually is. It’s not that he doesn’t care or doesn’t want to care, he just respects boundaries. It’s not his fault you’re all careless with your dirty laundry that he can’t help but notice it when it’s getting blown all over his yard where he’s over here just trying to mind his own business (ignoring that he’s so naturally observant that ‘obvious’ means different things for him than for most people), but he’s still going to go through the trouble to neatly pack it up and give it back to you in a discreet little box and pretend he never saw a thing. We need a thousand more like him. Seems like the kind of guy who you wouldn’t notice was starting to warm up to you, because his default setting is “quietly polite” and “refuses to talk about himself without significant motivation” with absolutely everyone, right up until you hit Max Friendship and you end up with him fussing with your hair while he complains about dirt at you because all he’s got to work with is his little farming book and a lot of passion and that’s fine but being so hyper-competent all the time is hard. I feel like Yayax has figured this out about him, which is why they’re all together all the time. They’re friends.

Favorite moment : When Ordo turns up on Qiilura in full hush hush Secret Squirrel mode, face-to-face with Levet all set to lie, misdirect, and dazzle, and Levet’s just like, “Oh, there you are. Yeah, she’s right up those stairs. Still super pregnant.” in the secret language. And Ordo just like...grinds to a halt. The wind is just gone from his sails.

“...Ah,” he says. And that’s it. That is literally all he can say.

“Yep,” Levet says, and Ordo - literally in the narrative it says this - Ordo is bracing (bracing!) in case Levet decides to drop any more bombshells, but, nah. The birds tweet a bit and Levet, apparently satisfied that he’s already rocked the Captain’s world enough, just pops his helmet on, politely gestures good-bye, and goes on about his day. I’m sure the 50,000 other major secrets Levet’s carrying around inside his cuirass aren’t any of Ordo’s business, and it would be rude to share.

Idea for a story : ...So up in the Impression Now section I nearly wrote something like, “If, in a surprise soap opera twist, Levet turned out to actually be one of the “dead” Nulls I wouldn’t be surprised”, and...uh...

UH.

(N-8 didn’t fail to gestate. Examination of the genome showed flaws that indicated a high chance of failure to express certain key features, and it was put on freeze instead for future examination. Eventually the motion of put forth that perhaps the key features N-8 lacked could make for a more controllable specimen, if also developed under the new, proven indoctrination program. It could give them a better understanding of exactly where the Null genome failed, and improve any future attempts at enhancement to the product. So CC-3388/0021 was born. dun dun DUN.)

Unpopular opinion : This section doesn’t fit so INSTEAD I’m going to take the opportunity to say that I am extremely curious how Levet - an infantry commander - fell in with a Commando squad to the point where they all tumbled onto Mandalore at the same time and proceeded to live forevermore attached at the hip. What a noodle incident.

Consider: Cov and Levet both convinced they’re the one who adopted the other.

Favorite relationship : The general one he was with Yayax squad, honestly. They didn’t get too much characterization so I can’t go in deep, but whatever they have going on over there seems great for them, and that’s nice.

Favorite headcanon : To this day, Ordo regards Levet going about his “I’m just humble farmer” routine with vague wariness and every time Levet says anything there’s a tiny little part of Ordo braced for a heart attack. Never forget. (Little known fact that Levet has a terrible sense of humor and finds this very funny.)

Anonymous asked:

For the character ask game: Jaing

Hey!

(Hint for all of these: the more I ramble the less confident I am in my grasp of a character. Jaing especially is like...I have this extremely consistent image in my head of who he is but actually breaking down WHY I have him that way is extremely hard and it doesn’t come out quite right. He’s still in the early soup stage. Canon scenes and general impressions have yet to dissolve and mix together into something coherent, which is why here you have this chunky, gloopy mess. He’s not done! Put him back on the stove!)

First impression : Gloves. Out of a person.

Impression now : Still Did That. But, like...He’s complicated, all right? He had to make that leather. He had to make those gloves. That is an involved process? He spent days at least neck deep in that particular activity, and I am NOT sure how to take that, because on one hand, of course, yikes, that’s worse than just a crime of passion, but on the other this...somehow seems to have actually been therapeutic for him? An act of closure and comfort? Afterward he’s significantly more relaxed and in a better mood overall, and is even noted in 501st to have taken it upon himself to keep Mereel company as moral support. Jaing. For Mereel. It’s an interesting contrast, that Mereel’s still (understandably) struggling (and might have re-traumatized himself with the way they handled Ko Sai’s body, which is why extreme acts of vengeance like this are typically not recommended, besides the whole...extreme acts of vengeance thing, obviously), while for Jaing, for all that his actions were incredibly disturbing, it’s apparently more of a closed chapter. He’s found some sort of peace with the issue now. And that seems to...sort of characterize him? He’s guided by his emotions primarily, and since his emotions tend to be very extreme this means he lives in extremes, and seems to deal in them, too. And once it’s done, it’s done. This isn’t exactly healthy, but then, none of them really are. It just seems to be how he operates.

In terms of emotional honesty I’d set Jaing closer on the spectrum to A’den, just also with more extreme mood swings and a much better grasp of social manipulation. I feel like he’s somewhere middle of the pack in terms of emotional intelligence (he’s a bit callous about Ordo’s feelings a couple times in 501st, but doesn’t seem to do it deliberately), but is on the slightly higher end in regards to actual compassion - still not a lot, and he doesn’t like it, but he does have it, even if it’s only enough to make him a bit uncomfortable sometimes. See his reaction to Kom’rk over Jusik and the fact that he’s always the Null notable for being around when someone needs care? (Which is...interesting, considering, but Jaing was the one helping Fi’s early recovery and settling him in on Mandalore before Parja took over. He’s the one noticing Mereel struggling and keeping him company when he’s distressed in 501st. When the extraction of Niner and Darman fails and the others are still reeling about failing the mission, he immediately moved to keep some of the heat off Niner’s back without instruction and without saying anything until it was already done, which was about when everyone else only started worrying about the cameras. One interpretation of his relationship with Kom’rk is he’s the one keeping tabs and checking in on him, since Ordo usually gets Kom’rk’s status from Jaing. I’m not sure what to do with all this yet, but it’s sure there.)

He’s very charming too, of course, especially when he’s in a good mood, but he can swing to sullen at the drop of a hat and can be a very grumpy boy when he’s not excited (and he basically seems to swing between “irritable” and “excitable” with minimal stops in between), which makes sense because emotional swinging is exhausting and he’s liable to be overly sensitive to most social stimuli in response, since anything would be liable to set him back on that roller-coaster.

Favorite moment : When they’re trying to extract Niner and Darman and as soon as things start to break down, Jaing’s mood immediately plummets into sullenness and he gets a bit grumbly. But when they have to leave Niner and bang out, while even Ordo is still reeling a bit from what’s going on, we find out Jaing’s already moved without needing to be prompted to keep some of the heat off Niner’s back. That’s sort of his job, sure, but it still shows that he was thinking about it even when he’s being a grump and...I don’t know, I liked it. Jaing’s gonna help you out but he’s gonna be super grumpy and flippant about it.

He also seems to like Niner at least a bit (they interact a lot in 501st, comparatively, and their dynamic is kind of fun), which is also why I like that scene.

Idea for a story : Still feeling a winter holidays sort of vibe, I guess. Jaing hunting Kom’rk - who’s been alone for way too long - down somewhere remote and he’s hauled actual space hot chocolate up three damn mountains or something, and once he finds Kom’rk proceeds to bitch him out the whole time he makes the hot chocolate and then makes him take the hot chocolate and they sit up on a cold ass cliff with their hot drinks and swing their legs out over the abyss and watch the skyline for a bit while Kom’rk’s emotions slowly creep back into existence and it’s nice.

Unpopular opinion : I don’t know enough about the popular opinions. I know they’re out there, but hell if I know what they are. So instead, have a song! (Youtube link for MARINA AND THE DIAMONDS - Savages. ‘Cause why not.)

Favorite relationship : The one he has with Kom’rk, ~~for basically the same reasons I listed in Kom’rk’s section.~~ Okay I stopped being lazy and went and copied it: A very interesting take on the those two guys concept that I adore. I also like the idea that Jaing “People Gloves” Skirata, was probably the one who followed Kom’rk “nobody got me a cake /jk /kinda not really” Skirata to the Outer Rim to provide emotional support for him while he self-isolated. Their dynamic is bloody and sweet, I think. Also, smooth, personable, soft-spoken Kom’rk and Jaing, who can be very charming in a more endearing, toothy smile sort of way, but comparatively is a bit more a bull in a china shop and is more easily and obviously wounded (Skirata) and...I don’t know. I feel like Jaing might take care of Kom’rk as much as Kom’rk takes care of Jaing, and I just like it.

Favorite headcanon : The mood swings and emotional dysregulation fall into headcanon territory, I think. Also the mental image I have of him from kaasknot’s fic. I think that’s my favorite version of Jaing, honestly.

Edited 2021-12-26 22:36 (UTC)

Kal

Hi!

Juuust a forewarning, since I don't know if you've seen much of my typical rambling, but I have a contentious relationship with Kal Skirata, so. Be warned? Also trying to talk about this without dipping into a bit of TMI is impossible. If you don't want to deal with that, skip the first two impressions, please!

First impression : I first read these books up to True Colors (O66 and 501st came out later) all together when I was a young teenager nearly a decade before I'd finally start being able to admit to myself that I had been abused, and I adored Kal Skirata. I wasn't capable of daydreams involving myself, but I obsessively re-read the part where he took in the child!Nulls. He was just like my mother, except in the ways he was so much better.

Impression now : No argument that KT's main strength is her ability to create vivid characters. Kal as a character is incredibly important to me because he's one of the most perfect characterizations of an (unintentionally but still very) emotionally abusive parent I've ever read. He's toxic. He's harming everyone around him. And as a person, using Kal - a fictional character - as a proxy to sort through my own understanding of my own treatment and my own mother is a useful exercise. The fact Kal doesn't ever do it on purpose is what matters to me too, because it's too easy for people to decide toxic people are that way by some grand calculating plan, deliberately maneuvering everyone around them like expert chess masters, when really it's usually just because they're damaged, frightened people lashing out and grasping on instinctively, who aren't capable of recognizing the harm they're doing. Like the emotional equivalent of a drowning person latching on to anyone nearby and not capable of realizing when they shove them down under the water. It's the human desire to be liked and appreciated absent the ability to self-reflect and cope in a healthy, productive manner, and an unwillingness to self-correct when their own lacking behaviors are pointed out to them. Kal wants to be a good person. He wants to do right by his kids and be super-dad and all of that. He really, really wants it, and that makes it easy to excuse him, because his intentions are so good. ~~(Except he's also got a bit of a white savior thing going on, but I digress.)~~

The fact that being seen as that person (so that he can see himself as that person) matters more to him than actually doing the hard work of correcting his behaviors so he can be that person is where he fails. He wants without putting in any actual, productive effort. If it doesn't make him feel better about himself, it scares him, and he does his best to ignore it away and make everyone validate him so he can pretend he never did anything wrong to start with. This man gaslights like he breathes. He uses dramatic shows to "erase" damage he's done without actually taking into account if the person he's trying to "make amends" to actually feels better after he's done (see: Darman). He can spin the narrative of self-improvement, but he wavers at actually walking it. It's human. It's very, very human. It's the way humans hurt other humans, especially ones as vulnerable as children. And it's a narrative that's sorely lacking, I think, which is why I cling to Skirata's.

And most importantly, that whatever else might have happened in Skirata's life to harm him, whatever his intentions were, that doesn't matter. People aren't allowed to hurt you just because they don't mean to, or because they've been hurt themselves.

Favorite moment : Okay, so after he shakes hands and leaves Altis's ship and realizes he's still contagious with the vaccine-fever and he just looks at his hand in disgust and then mutters something like, "I should have charged you." I laughed.

I really, really like when Kal actually is the put-out old crook dragged kicking and screaming into something approximating morality by his love for six little boys, and I wish he'd been written that way more often, because he talks about himself that way sometimes but too obviously views himself as more-moral-than-thou at literally all times, not helped by KT warping reality around him to always make sure he's the most right and moral character in the series. I wouldn't actually give him up as he is though, because, again: I think his narrative is rare enough to be very important, for all that this is an obscure Star Wars book series in a universe with space wizards. I'm attached.

Idea for a story : Sort of brainstorming this for a little while now, but: Time travel. Falin gets dumped on Ordo shortly after being found by Munin but before Munin manages to erase his name, or Ordo travels back and stumbles across little Falin and promptly kidnaps him because Munin is a Hard No. It'd be about breaking the cycle of abuse, Falin/Kal getting a better start after the hell he had to deal with and deserving much better than fucking Munin, and Ordo/the Nulls having the opportunity to recognize Kal's bad treatment through having to parent Falin/realizing where Kal came from and grappling with their own unwillingness to pass those things on, and coming to terms with why they don't want to pass those things on. And also trying to cope with realizing some hard facts about a parent's treatment of you after they're already gone somewhere you can't get to them, and how rough that can be. For obvious reasons, them coming to terms with their own abuse, and not really being equipped to deal with Falin's trauma, means there would have to be a broader cast to provide support, possibly even take over as Falin's primary caregiver for awhile (good luck getting past a freaked out and protective Ordo, but like many things, I'm willing to throw Laseema at the problem and assume it will work out) but that's more detail than I've got so far. Point is the Nulls (especially Ordo) coming face-to-face with Falin.

I'm actually sort of attached to Laseema recognizing aspects of Falin's treatment and actually being a good point of connection for him. She understands better than anyone else in that house exactly what sort of thing Falin's gone through, I think. At least the losing everything parts, and being taken, and being expected to perform to a new expectation by these strangers you have no power to combat, not even to keep your own name. I have an image of Falin nursing a wild bird back to health, and, being Kal still, wanting to keep it forever even once it's healed, and Laseema walking him out into the yard, and talking to him beyond the range of the Nulls' hearing, and eventually convincing him to let it go.

Unpopular opinion : *shrugs* Kal's a polarizing character. I'm very critical of him and want him to face some hard consequences, which is going to be very unpopular with some people, but not others.

Favorite relationship : Vau. They're both shitty old people and their relationship is hilarious. Literally the only character Kal doesn't have any sort of hold on, and they fight like cats and dogs but with the impression that they'll be shoulder-to-shoulder at the pub later or something. Angry old couple who fight all the time. I do, in fact, find myself shipping it sometimes with a sort of fascinated horror.

Favorite headcanon : Not 100% of the time, but this just said "favorite" not "permanent": He has a very, very repressed crush on Vau. Vau sometimes has a significantly less-repressed crush, but knows it would go over like a lead balloon and be less fun that way anyway, so instead he just hangs around and riles Kal up and that's basically enough for him.

Edited 2021-12-28 23:07 (UTC)

Congrats I agree on all points, though I usually judge Kal's abuse on a Doylist level rather than Watsonian: that it's a consequence of KT's genuine cluelessness about how a good parent treats their kids. So my Kal-bashing usually looks like "fuck, if only KT had actually recognized Kal for the bad parent he is and written him accordingly, the way she did Vau. He'd have been so much better as a character, because he'd be flawed and realistic instead of KT's grotesque Marty Stu wank fodder"

When I'm writing fic tho I def go at it from your angle

No, I agree! I just prefer to talk about it from an in-universe perspective because that's where I feel Kal's toxic and abusive behavior is most evident, and because whatever KT might have intended, she did write a very good portrayal of an emotional abuser. Trying to talk about whether KT meant to have written a very good portrayal of an emotional abuser is beside the point, for me. I feel like those are two separate conversations and I can't juggle them both at once.

This is primarily because I know I get a little lost in the sauce because sometimes I read him and think there's no way KT didn't write him that way on purpose? She hit just about every single check point of emotional abuse that exists; it's like she had a list on her desk as she wrote. Sometimes the other characters even notice these things, which muddies the waters even worse. It leaves a niggling bit of doubt for me that maybe the series just ended too early for all of this to blow up in Kal's face the way it might(?) have been intended? (Or, more accurately, the way I just wish it had been intended, because KT had the perfect set-up. She had all of the pieces she needed to make a really amazing narrative about the different forms of abuse and she just set it all on fire.)

But at the same time she bends reality to support Kal's status as the moral center of the universe and every single other character we are meant to like constantly argues against why Kal can't possibly be a toxic and harmful man as KT's mouthpieces. So.

~~The unapologetic and extremely prevalent sexism and racism in the series don't exactly improve KT's credentials, either.~~

So I mostly assume KT either didn't intend Kal to be taken as emotionally abusive (which is alarming, considering how textbook of a portrayal he is), or realized she'd written him that way only belatedly and that's why most of the series is her backpedaling and hitting us all over the head with the 'Kal is GOOD and GREAT' mallet from the other POV characters, similar to the way she decided she liked Vau and immediately went about sweeping his shit under the rug. But there's that 'but what if' little part of me that persists.

Yeah KT is a godawful person IRL, so odds are extremely high that she was completely unaware how emotionally abusive Kal is. I'm not kidding when I say he's her wank fodder; she was unironically writing him as an ideal man and the very epitome of loving fatherhood. Which. 😬 Long story short, she wasn't planning on turning the tables to reveal how awful he is, because she didn't see how awful he is. I kind of see the Repcomm books the way I see Firefly: I love them, but dear god I'm glad they got cancelled when they did. She's a really great example of how sometimes authors don't know shit about the stories they're telling.

But if it's better for you to examine Kal's story on an in-story level, then that's legit. I don't have a lot to say about it, mostly because I don't have many fic ideas in Repcomm, so I don't need to examine Kal on an in-story basis. If I had more fic ideas then I could probably talk more about it :P

Letsse, you've already done Vau, so may I request Corr?

Hi! Thank you for your comment, I really appreciate it! Sorry for the wait; I try to do these in the order I receive them and I had one on Tumblr just before yours.

Corr's tricky for me, and separating what I can draw from him in canon from the way kaasknot's fic fleshed him out in my head is hard, lol. I don't think I entirely succeeded. Not least because I'm falling asleep on my keyboard, whoops.

First impression : I do not remember. He sure existed?

Impression now : For a guy KT liked to use as a MadLibs booklet every time she needed a random character to do anything and then shoved off-screen at every opportunity, he sure managed to make himself interesting. His canon personality is a bit all over the place, but just his story in general? There's so much there. I'm still fascinated by the fact that apparently after finishing his training, Corr was still running with the Nulls for awhile. Presumably he was spinning his wheels until they had a placement for him, like what happened when Skirata recalled him from a mission he was in the middle of with Jaing, but instead of planting him back in the barracks the Nulls just...kept him. Which says something, I feel. Corr's just one of those guys who has an entire novel's worth of shit happening, but it's taking place entirely off screen and no one ever talks about it. His life is a series of noodle incidents and he never talks about himself. Ever. And so noodle incidents they will remain.

Favorite moment : During O66 when Kal's trying to deflect Niner by dropping the bomb about the second army and Corr goes straight on point like a hunting hound so that when Niner starts to go, "That's nice, now back to the topic at ha-" Corr does everything short of slamming a hand over Niner's mouth. I think he actually says something like, "Niner, shut up," or something, with the implied, "What second army?"

Which is very rude of Corr, who up until this point has been characterized as being very careful around Omega in a Must Keep Arms And Feet Inside The Vehicle At All Times approach to this new squad thing. On top of being raised as a line trooper with far stricter standards of behavior. Telling his sergeant to shut up has implications coming from Corr that it doesn't coming from, say, Darman or Atin.

And, sure, it's the exact reaction that Kal wanted, which sucks, but at the same time I think it says a lot about Corr's own priorities. It sort of speaks to me of his time running second to the Nulls' own missions. There's still a part of him that thinks like them, and just like they were Shook upon this discovery, so is Corr. He also, from his time with them, probably has a broader understanding of the really alarming implications, besides the more obvious alarming implications. And just doesn't have a reason to care about Jilka over the second army. Niner doesn't fall for it as an all-or-nothing trade, information on Jilka's situation or information on the second army, but if Corr does, he knows which one he picks.

Idea for a story : Corr still being treated like part of Omega once he and Atin make it to Mandalore and reunite with Fi. Just. IDK. A bonding activity. Something. Fi being able to talk to Corr about things Fi might still have a hard time trying to explain to Atin, maybe. Like, you know, maybe Corr's been there before or something.

Unpopular opinion : (I don’t think this series really has popular opinions, but we’ll work with what we have:) Corr still doesn't really understand the One True Marriage/Must Be In Want Of A Wife ideal that most of the rest of the characters in the series were raised with, so him having a "girl in every port" is less him deliberately "playing the field" and more his squad trying to sync his behavior through their own cultural lenses.

Really, Corr's just a friendly guy who sometimes has sex with people he likes, with zero expectations on either side or even the real understanding that there should be (which I wonder about anyway, since Star Wars doesn't have a sex before marriage taboo to my understanding, which would be funny if it was just Skirata but I digree). Those "girls" are his friends. That's literally it. He does not get why his squad mates keep chortling among each other and ribbing him about this. Or, he does. Intellectually. But he doesn't get it.

Favorite relationship : I really want to say Mereel even though I've been realizing slowly over the course of the last couple weeks that for all there is so much interesting about their potential dynamic, they basically never interact on-screen in the books? H o w.

All the Nulls he's canonically worked with also, though, so Mereel, Kom'rk, and Jaing.

Favorite headcanon : Corr approaches Jilka flirting because he learned it as a defusing tool from Mereel and no one else was working with her to keep her from eventually snapping and, like, stabbing Besany or something. That's his sole motivation. He's halfway winging it. How the relationship plays out after that - especially when it rapidly grows outside Corr's control on account of him not really understanding why using flirting tactics on someone you live with isn't really the best idea - varies to me, but my primary interest is in the culture clash potential.

no worries! <3 and oh i love these responses so much. ;a; won't be able to comment on every bit of it but yesss I can absolutely see where you're coming from and I love you take the angles that aren't just, you know The Most Obvious lmao.

To your point about Corr and Niner - it's interesting, not that I would say he has a sharper survival instinct than the others (because they all do, and it's not so much better/worse as it is different shapes of very sharp and honed survival-blades) - but whether it's the nulls rubbing off of him, he's attuned and independent in a way that, yeah, you wouldn't expect from a rank and file mind. i always wonder if the rank and file dears were testy about independence of their minds like jedi looking into their minds as much as the nulls probably were, and if that's the kind of (difference?) consideration he'd think about.

that fi and corr conversation/fic would be amazing and honestly one of those scenes that shoulda been in O66 or the new trilogy itself - wraps up several story arcs there in a satisfying way. ;a;

(also l m a o @ skirata being the only one to have sex hangups, i love it.)

I'm glad you enjoy them! Thank you :)

I might not have understood your middle paragraph perfectly, but here I go: So these are just my feelings, of course, but I actually think him being rank and file might be the reason why the idea of a second army being out there is personal enough for him to make him step on Niner's toes? Like, running with the Nulls I think also made him kneejerk lock on to this kind of thing, since it's in their wheelhouse, and made him more immediately aware that this isn't good news - their influence is why he's able to jump straight past "Yay, reinforcements!" and into alarm.

But I also feel like, for Corr, this was always going to be more personal, because it's the Troopers like him, for reasons of sheer numbers and also being last in line for anything and everything, who are feeling the lack of support the hardest. Who are dying quickest and in the greatest number. Like Maze says when Ordo asks if he's capable of recognizing the injustice of his situation, "You're damn right I do." When they're the ones dying all over the places, I don't think even the line troopers are exempt from the dawning realization that shit's fucked up. They just have their Kamino conditioning - to a far, far greater degree than the RC's or ARC's - that tell them complaining openly about these things to outsiders isn't safe or productive. They probably keep it to themselves. Which just exacerbates the "poor dumb sheep" impression people like Skirata have of them, except for "exceptions" who have been "saved" like Corr.

Hearing there are reinforcements out there, or reinforcements who might be coming, or worse, that they exist and aren't being used is one of those things that - I feel - would just arrow in on a lot of that anger Corr has that we catch glimpses of under the surface (if his sense of humor is any guide, anyway. It tends to be very wry and jaded, and he's quick to dismiss it when anyone takes him seriously, but we sometimes catch glimpses of a real fury there that he keeps hidden under the cinders. It's just a surprise when it actually ignites fast enough to flash past the more flippant exterior he presents.)

It's not that he - or any line trooper - doesn't have the mind (though they may lack context), it's that usually they seem to keep whatever they're thinking or feeling about a situation determinedly tucked away around outsiders because they've known their whole lives that who they are and what they think doesn't matter to anyone outside their own circle. Their opinion on what's happening to them has never been necessary. Corr's eased up on this after training with the Nulls, which I think is a factor to his barging over Niner, but even he's still not exempt from this, and even through O66 he seems to have kept that self-protective, perfect commodity, don't-rock-the-boat mask partially running. The mask the RC's say they can mimic but that the line troopers perfected. So because his mask is more perfect and automatic, him breaking through it to basically claw over Niner to get at this information has more weight, and I think it's because he was made as a line trooper and this is very personal for him.

...Uh, so, TL;DR, I do feel like the line troopers definitely have opinions about things happening to them, but that they're unlikely to ever actually voice those opinions even if directly asked unless they're very, very close to the person they're talking to, and feel safe.

you're making me remember plot elements i had clear forgotten about in O66 xD; it's been a while since I've read that one; any inaccuracies were entirely due to my patchy memory, yeah.

nodding at all of what you're saying; getting ready to go to bed so i'm a little sleep fuzzed but think you made some excellent additional points that honestly make me excited to re-read that book and see how that extra-personal quality comes out. thank you ~

anonymous asked:

Okay, before every single RepCom character has been pitched and/or you've finally burned out on these character asks: Arligan Zey ~ZZ

Hello again! Honestly, I'm surprised at the response? I thought I'd get maybe one or two. Thank you all for letting me ramble on so much :)

I might burn out a bit, but honestly if someone finds this is in, like, a month or something and tosses me a character I'd probably still be down. I'd miss the interaction too much otherwise if I just stopped. Ask games are basically indefinite.

Unfortunately, I don't have much to say about Zey. He's a good bean, though <3

First impression : Somehow missed every single reference to this guy being a brick shithouse. I had like...typical scholarly wizard build for him in my head until this last re-read.

Impression now : Give this man a break. A five minute nap maybe. He was fucking drafted and didn't even get the benefit of basic training to teach him how to military; he is doing his absolute best but too aware that he's just winging it and it's stressing him out but he refuses to show it because he seems to view it as his responsibility to at least appear to have some sort of handle on this shitshow. But he's not actually doing that bad of a job? For someone in his situation, he's doing exactly the right thing: Identifying the specialists and experts and taking pains to stay out of their way, even at great expense to himself, and regardless of his feelings about them personally. See: Skirata, who treats him like shit almost always, but Zey still bends over backward to make sure he has the room to do his job, and only tends to ask for the bare minimum in information in response. He's so cognizant that he's in over his head, but if he doesn't do this job, who will they put in his place? This is a Jedi billet. It's not like any of the other Jedi are going to know how to do it better, so instead he buckles down and tries to support the people who know what they're doing as much as he can, and all he asks is to have enough tabs on this ferret nest so that he can be ready to head off any interference they might face from above his head? Very reasonable. More than reasonable.

We know he's constantly battling Palpatine and trying to work with Mace Windu and the other senior Masters to try and get something to make this war a little less of a shitshow, to figure out what is even going on, but for obvious reasons Palpatine's like, "Oh, no, no, no, not possible," and their hands are tied. And they don't understand why. Zey spends so much of the series making the best of a shit situation and he just gets so tired by the end, and there isn't anyone to help him when he starts breaking down because no matter what move he makes it's the wrong one, people are getting hurt, people he knows are getting hurt, that is a literal slave army right there and he can't stop it, can't fix a single thing, not without doing more damage elsewhere, no possibility of harm reduction, and it gets to me, all right.

Favorite moment : SEEING NO BREAK IN THE WALL OF CONSPIRACY, ZEY DECIDED TO BARREL THROUGH IT IN TRUE ZEY FASHION. I love this man. It's what makes him breaking down in slow motion throughout Order 66 so much harder to witness.

Idea for a story : Zey seems like he would give great hugs when he's not busy being Professional Jedi On The Job and Maze is NOT a huggy kind of guy, but maybe sometime after Order 66 Zey gets excited about something, probably the first time he's been this much himself, been willing to take up so much space, since the genocide, and Maze just...accepts the amazing bear hug. As a one time thing. His feet maybe leave the ground a little bit. It possibly makes him smile a little where his face is mashed into Zey's shoulder and part of his beard, but you'll never be able to prove it.

Unpopular opinion : Uh. Depends on what your view of the Jedi in general is, I guess.

Favorite relationship : The one he has with Maze. Bookworm ARC and his giant bear-man of a Jedi who brings him coffee. I bet he brought him things from the Jedi Archives sometimes. I bet he showed Maze how to access the Jedi Archives. It's a library without a no-weapons-allowed rule! Perfect!

Favorite headcanon : ...I don't actually have any?

tiend asked:

Scorch for the character ask game?

Thank you so much. Not sure where you're at, but if it applies I hope you have a happy New Year!

First impression : From the game, not the books, but you know, funny comic relief guy. I think even back then though, I thought it was interesting how wry he was, especially for someone described as the "heart and soul" of the team, since I was used to that meaning someone who was maybe a little more innocent than the rest, or sensitive, or compassionate. Scorch is none of those things. (I got Boss into SO MUCH SHIT and Scorch's weary sarcasm every time Boss ended up on his ass made a mark, all right.)

Impression now : Scorch is the heart and soul of Delta and that is a warning! His rare POV chapters are incredibly interesting, especially when compared against the only other member of Delta squad whose head we get to ride around in, in that Scorch is...not super interested in what other people have going on. He notices it, but if it's not another member of Delta he just cannot be assed to care beyond a rapid risk assessment to see how much it might impact them. He kind of gets close to appreciating Etain, but at a significant step removed. I think his exact words are that they, "have an understanding." This could just be an intact squad thing, since Fi remembers being just as insular, but Sev doesn't do this.

It sort of makes me think that Scorch tends to interact with the world in a way that reminds me of...sort of like when you're looking out through the heavy, slightly pitted, off-color plastic of a face shield or face mask, if that makes any sense. Even when he goes into a blackout rage, he stays solidly detached from his emotions, riding them like an unknowable tornado, and won't really label or examine them even after it's over.

The exceptions to this are when Scorch sometimes acknowledges "safe" positive emotions, and he always acknowledges fear and stress responses when confronted with Vau, though absolutely none of that makes it through to his surface presentation. Like when Vau tells him to come see him in his quarters at 1800 and Scorch is terrified but all he does is quip out a casual, "Sure thing." I thought that was an interesting note on the disconnect between Scorch's mouth and his actual (if ignored) feelings, and probably says a lot about how Scorch handled Vau's abuse in general. Vau's a sadist. Scorch...doesn't show fear. Not only does Scorch not show fear, he makes a point to be casual with the source of his fear. He also cares a lot about his squad, and Sev in particular, but doesn't really consciously acknowledge this until and unless shit hits the fan. He expresses it by avoiding teasing Sev about things Sev is actually sensitive about and constantly checking on him and having a moment where he - from inside his head - feels almost angry (a lot of emotions feel a lot like frustration if you refuse to actually identify them, weirdly enough. This one was almost definitely "worry") when thinking about how sensitive Sev is and comforts himself by ~~cutting the emotion short~~ reminding himself that "he keeps an eye on him" and then dropping it entirely.

WHICH. Means I'm not surprised when Scorch's emotions occasionally just shut him down. He goes into rage blackouts and gets tied up in knots with stress and panic, like the reaction that rendered him mostly ineffective when Sev went missing, frozen between stay or go and unable to get a grip long enough to commit until Boss took the reins from him. That does tend to be what happens when you refuse to process your shit. It rears up and punches you in the face and you can't handle it because you never learned how to cope with your emotions in a healthy manner.

This doesn't mean Scorch doesn't feel things, or that he lacks empathy or compassion, it's just that he does his level best to keep his emotional reactions shallow, and compassion is basically never a conscious priority for him. Being in a situation where he might have to feel or act on sympathy for another person would probably just make him uncomfortable. I doubt he'd know how to handle it. Somebody who spends a lot of time pretending he doesn't have feelings would probably not know what to do with someone who is very publically feeling theirs. Not because he doesn't care, but because he literally has no frame of reference for how to behave. The fact he's set himself up as Sev's keeper is especially interesting in this light. Sev's refusal to stop feeling things probably stresses Scorch right the hell out.

Which also fits Sev thinking to himself that the rest of Delta never seemed to want to talk about their feelings or concerns, so he feels like he has to keep his to himself. Sev thinks about his feelings a lot and wants to talk about them sometimes, but knows it's not something his squad does. Scorch included.

Because! As the heart and soul of the team, Scorch is indicative of his squad's emotional default. Which is very, very repressed.

~~And traumatized by their extremely abusive upbringing, Vau.~~

Favorite moment : On Kashyyyk when we're in Scorch's POV (already a very rare treat) and Scorch is observing everything going on in that way he does where he tags it all with zero emotions whatsoever, but just so happens to keep idly checking in on Sev like he's put himself on a timer or something. He is in the middle of an actual damn full frontal charge on treetops and he still has to take a pause to visually check on Sev, which is not something he does for Boss or Fixer, lol.

It's just cute. Scorch cares a lot about Sev, and it's nice to see.

Idea for a story : uhhhHHHHH. Okay, so this is more about Niner, BUT. The Scorch dynamics could be fun. So Darman doesn't get the opportunity to stay behind with Niner and Niner gets integrated with Delta instead after he's healed (HIGHLY unlikely considering the nature of the battalion as a test for flight risks and them wanting to divide and conquer among the squads and seed in spies, but anyway) and basically Niner being...himself and still branching out into amateur psychology, which is still way more than any clone has ever gotten before, and Delta just having to Deal With That. Scorch gives Niner a pass because he knows Niner's squad is still out there even if they can never, ever talk about it, so he knows Niner understands this is just temporary, it's cool, it's fine, and dammit Scorch needs to aim his codependent tendencies somewhere and Boss and Fixer are both in the doghouse. Welcome to the squad, Niner, congratulations, you will never be alone again.

Unpopular opinion : Uhhh. Not that I think this is really a "popular" opinion since I doubt those exist, but I've seen portrayals of Scorch as like, the "youngest" or the one who "needs the most protection" on AO3, and I don't see it, personally.

Favorite relationship : Sev. For. All the reasons already talked about in extreme detail. And because I appreciate the genuine care and affection because god knows Sev deserves and needs it, but also because I kind of view it as a little...maladaptive, and probably a bit detrimental to Sev despite Scorch's best intentions, which is interesting for me to think about.

Favorite headcanon : ...I hope you all know how hard it is not to once again talk about the dead Vau thing. Uh. I think I veered into this during the "Impression Now" portion of this, actually.

Anonymous asked:

Hi! ☺️ Can you do the ask game for Prudii then?

Thank you! I probably should not have attempted this after my bedtime. I'm sleepy as hecks. But I got the motivation, so here it is!

First impression : So this guy was my absolute favorite Null when I was kid? Even though my copy of True Colors didn't even have the short story for some reason? I can't actually tell you what tripped the lever for me; I just thought he was neat, I guess.

Impression now : Okay. Of them all, I have the weakest grasp on Prudii, I think. Unlike Jaing, where I have a fairly consistent characterization and am just feeling out why I think he's that way, Prudii still waivers like a heat mirage sometimes. So, feeling it out: He's patient for a Null, which mostly seems to mean that even though he gets annoyed quickly, he'd rather just take a couple deep breaths and try again rather than just punch out the source. Probably why he gets tapped for training purposes, even if he struggles to handle certain personality types, and even though he can get flustered/frustrated when someone can’t or refuses to keep up with him when he’s trying to talk to them or explain something, r/ Atin not following the conversation he was trying to have in Odds and Prudii promptly clamming up. He seems like he’d overall be a pretty good teacher when things are going well or the speedbumps are small, but a trainee being difficult or struggling to learn would probably trip Prudii up pretty bad - as in, I feel like he would probably take both kind of personally and it’d stress him out disproportionately. New teacher blues. He’d try really hard, though.

Comparing him to A'den is kind of interesting, especially how they react to Atin. Prudii's more high-strung, and his patience is a conscious decision that requires effort and practice. Atin is pushing his buttons through most of Odds, but all he does is get quieter and more exasperated (and maybe a little neurotic, like when he keeps prodding Atin for the reaction he wants, but the point is he’s trying), and even when he's obviously annoyed, he's usually trying to pretend he's not and approach the situation calmly. A'den just seems to have fewer buttons in general, making him more naturally chill in comparison, but when his buttons do get pushed, he lashes out (sorry, Niner).

He seems pretty boisterous by nature when he’s happy or safe, but seems a little self-conscious about it, like - again with Atin, because Atin’s brand of Judging You seems to really get to him - when he immediately assumed Atin was annoyed with him directly after pulling the escape stunt and swung from proud of himself and a little excited to weirdly insistent about explaining why he did the reckless thing, so Atin shouldn't be mad at him. I sort of get social anxiety vibes from him, honestly. He tries to be confident, and can get caught up easily in the moment, especially when around his brothers, but he's also the one stumbling to a verbal halt and pulling back in on himself, or getting defensive at anyone nearby like he feels like he has to explain why he's being loud or happy or reckless or taking up space in any way. This goes back to what I said earlier, where Prudii is very insistent, even when it's visibly frustrating him, that someone agree with him or otherwise understands and validates everything he does, even if it's just a random RC Private tapped for a random mission who he may as well never have to interact with again. I see this as an insecurity thing?

He also seems like the one least likely to interact closely with someone outside his immediate family by choice, which is probably why we see so little of him. Seems like he might prefer standard social scripts or other roles he can learn to perform when he has to engage with other people (the way he talks to the pilot and even offers Atin use of his name is a little stilted/scripted and not as natural or effortless as we’ve seen done before, and even Atin notes discrepancies in the act. To me it seems like he might be copying Kal or Mereel’s charm but doesn’t quite get it to the same extent, or at least that he fumbles it when he’s uncomfortable, and “trainer” is a role he can learn to fulfill, but if he has to meet up with any of his trainees outside of that context I can see him hitting a bit of a wall...okay, this parenthesis is too long, I’d need a whole other post for this, lol). I also feel this may, in part, be why I automatically think of him as the one most kneejerk defensive of Kal, behind Ordo. It’s twofold: He knows how to be the Dutiful Son and knows what’s expected of him in his relationship with Kal, while his family also is his safe space, so to have that status quo shaken up or threatened is probably deeply, deeply alarming for him.

Absolutely unbeatable at hide and seek.

Favorite moment : The fact Prudii called up A'den to warn him about Atin, lol. Or called up A'den to complain about Atin after their mission together in Odds. It's just funny to me. Atin, you scarred him.

Idea for a story : I'm gonna be honest. I have no idea. How about they're all playing Among Us and - even though this is a game about assassination and sabotage - Prudii actually being kind of bad at it because the game mechanics nerf the crap out of him. This absolutely offends his entire shit. He hates this game, but also refuses to stop playing it.

Unpopular opinion : Not super applicable, but okay, let's see: Prudii's tween phase was legendary. (You be developmentally 12 and be literally named Shadow and not have a Phase.)

Favorite relationship : Who does he even talk to? Uh. A'den, I guess? Since apparently he calls A'den up to complain about RCs being mean.

I did ship him and Niner for some reason when I was a kid, though. My multishipping ways started young.

Favorite headcanon : uhhhHHHHHH. All right, sure. Favorite is pushing it since I just came up with this on the spot, but: Probably one of the grumpiest of the Nulls right up there with Jaing, he just tries not to be. Is very suggestible, though. Leave him and Jaing alone in a room together, and the amount of salt you'll come back to could easily explode the hearts of thousands.

Edited 2022-01-12 11:33 (UTC)

purgetroopercody asked:

Niner for the character ask (but in like a month or two because you've written so many of these! 😅)

I appreciate the generous timeline, but you're asking me about my favorite character here.

(Thank you :) )

First impression : You know the beat up old stuffed toy who just looks like they have seen some shit that some people have? That was Niner to kid me. I latched on to him like a limpet, and expressed this affection by throwing him at every weirdass plot a kid my age could come up with. I had a thing for "oldest sibling"/"leader" character types with anxiety who are under a lot of pressure and just really, really wanted things to do what they were supposed to do and Niner hit all my buttons. Him and Silverbolt from the G1 Transformers cartoon, man. I put them through the wringer.

Impression now : Honestly, hasn't changed much? Mostly it's just gained new elements and perspective. I have a much better appreciation for his obstinacy and temper, which is a part of his character I sort of slept on when I was a child, and especially how it lives alongside his deeply caring nature (and anxiety), for better and for worse. I really like that he feels things very deeply, and needs to express his thoughts and feelings externally to really process them, but struggles with actually articulating those strong emotions and difficult thoughts to the point he usually just ends up blurting them out in a really garbled or unfiltered way that either confuses anyone who doesn't speak fluent Niner...or straight up pisses them off (looking at A'den). But also that he keeps working at it. He doesn't just, you know, shrug and go, "Oh, well, guess that's that," like Ordo does with his total inability to act reassuring even though he notes it as a problem at least twice in the series, or Kal does with his...everything. Instead he actively tries to improve. Most of his confused emotional outbursts happen when he's younger too, which is another fun thing, because we get to watch Niner grow into himself a bit over the course of the series. By 501st, Niner's shown on page to have been looking into things to understand and help Darman, and understanding his own limitations to the extent he goes out and finds answers so he can better help. We also see him reaching out to his squad in Order 66 similarly, which makes me think he's been trying to learn better communication skills and deepen his emotional literacy for awhile. Compare to Hard Contact and his way of approaching Fi in literally their first chapter together, and how he tries to get Fi to talk to him later in the book when Fi flat-out tells him he's checked out of the situation with Atin because he can't deal with it otherwise. Young!Niner keeps pushing at Fi because he wants to help, which only makes Fi lash out at him. It's a stark contrast to how he handles Darman in 501st, where he's consistent about checking on Darman and making sure Darman knows he's there for him without actually pushing him past where he's ready to go, which I thought was pretty great character development. This is less a general impression than a fixation on a particular part of his character, I know, but it's what I've got.

Also think it's hilarious that Niner is 100% transparent in a book where everyone is playing some sort of game 90% of the time. He is capable of chewing a man up one side and down the other in the same breath he tucks them in and asks if they want a glass of water and not a single person in his life ever feels like these are somehow mixed messages. He doesn't play emotional games and he doesn't withhold affection because he's irritated with someone, and so no one in his life doubts his affection and goodwill even when it's coming with a heavy dose of stress fussing.

Honestly, everyone in the book says Niner emulates Kal, but sometimes I think Niner is actually just much closer to being the guy Kal thinks he is to his kids.

Favorite moment : I've had a policy of never looking these up to check my memory and also for going with the first, most vivid scene to pop in my head, so: Niner in TZ when he covered a sleeping Skirata with a blanket. Just him standing over him with his hands on his hips and tutting, and then going to get the blanket and tucking this fifty-something year old man in, was just. So very Niner. Also not something we often get to see male characters doing in media, especially for other adult characters, and especially for other adult, male characters, for all that I don't actually want to give KT any sort of points in that direction whatsoever. I'm aware it was probably supposed to be more about Skirata than Niner, but it was a very nice moment regardless, and character-defining for Niner, I think.

Idea for a story : *slams fist on desk* CUDDLING. In a purely platonic way, I want to see Niner to have control taken away from him for a bit by someone he trusts, who wants to do that for him. I vote Boss.

I've only ever seen this written in a BDSM context? Which isn't really what I'm going for, but I guess if you can do platonic BDSM elements, then...that?

Just let him be quiet for awhile and not have to worry about anything. Cherish the man. Platonically.

Unpopular opinion : There are no such things as popular opinions here, I think, lol. Uhh, I don't know, I'm pretty attached to my "Niner is a sheepdog" comparison. I feel like it really says it all.

Favorite relationship : I've been intrigued by his relationship with Boss ever since I was a child and that has not changed. I think their dynamic is interesting and - while it has evolved a bit with time and age - hasn't actually shifted that much from my initial read of it. I feel like their personalities are an interesting blend of clashing and perfectly complimentary, and they can relate to each other in a way they can't with their squads. I sort of see them growing on each other like fungii.

Favorite headcanon : That Niner is very, very ace. I go back and forth a bit on the aro side of things, but even then I tend to lean toward quoiromantic at most.

Edited 2022-01-07 23:40 (UTC)

Etain for the character ask?

Ohhhh, that's a toughie. All right, I don't know you anon, but you're asking about a controversial character so...proceed with caution?

First impression : I don't think I had very many strong feelings about Etain, but I remember being disgusted by the way she got pregnant. Reading it now, there are aspects to it that I feel are way more complicated than how the narrative (and ~~Skirata's~~ KT's multi-book gaslighting campaign) present them, so I've eased up on that, but that whole plot is still...Eugh. She wasn't really a preferred character, but I grudgingly tolerated her, I suppose.

Impression now : *drags hands down face* Look, I have done like...so much drafting in my head for months about specific Etain things and this is hard, okay. I nearly don't even want to talk about it without at least three different separate whole entire papers to point to to flesh this shit out, but I'm going to try. Etain's very complicated, primarily because, from a Doylist perspective, so many things about how she's written just. Don't fucking make sense. They really don't make sense. Trying to Watsonian the mess is more than a humble ask game can hold. I'll do my best, but yeesh.

(PS. I've already made a separate post talking about how I feel Etain's badly underutilized as a character, so I won't be talking about that much either, but I still hold true: Etain was really good at espionage and I wish that had gone somewhere.)

But, Etain. She's actually pretty similar to Skirata in personality, I think. Not identical, but they have a lot of overlap, specifically in their flaws and way of behaving toward others, though the way they express these behaviors tends to differ. The core seems the same, though. Etain obviously has shittier self-esteem, but I feel like they both have a fear of abandonment/need to be special that drives a lot of their behaviors, but Etain's more aware of it and Skirata really isn't. I also think they're both very emotions-driven, both compassionate but so starry-eyed with the idea of doing good for people that they steamroll the same people they're trying to help, which leads into them both having major problems with boundaries and basic communication skills, and both very prone to "othering" anyone not in their in-crowd, to differing degrees of severity. If I was going to Watsonian Skirata's constant attacking of Etain throughout the books, I'd say the reason might be ~~besides Etain being a less conventionally attractive woman~~ because Etain and Skirata are too similar, and while she's alive Skirata is probably subconsciously reacting to that. Case: Skirata attacks her constantly for things his own POV will sometimes - amazingly - point out are things he does, too. This never actually goes anywhere, since it neither changes Skirata's behavior toward Etain nor makes him examine himself in any more detail, but I think it says a lot that it's there. It's also an interesting compare and contrast exercise, primarily for the following reason:

Because where Etain's different is that 1) none of the other characters ever let Etain get away with shit, so most of the things she pulls get her called out promptly and severely and 2) Etain actually wants to get better about how she treats people. She struggles sometimes and doesn't always get it right, but she's nearly always willing to listen to criticism and will try to do better come hell or high water, even if she doesn't really know what that looks like and ends up forging determinedly ahead in entirely the wrong direction. The spirit is there. I really, really wish therapy existed in Star Wars, because Etain would really benefit from it.

I also find her conversations with Darman where we get to see her from Darman's POV interesting to read, especially later in the series. Around Darman she's always more confident and secure, and it shows, I think. The neuroticism we see from other outside-in looks at Etain (basically only Ordo and Kal, really) dials down significantly, and without the anxiety you get a young woman who's a little stiff and abrupt, even a little stern, but also surprisingly funny and kind. Someone who maybe doesn't smile often, but man, when they do. I feel like we also got a bit of this during her interactions with Mereel, since I remember her POV chapters with him being much less...self-disparaging. So I mean, at least she had two people in this clan.

I like her character quite a bit now, actually, lol.

Favorite moment : Etain saving Niner and Fi from shrapnel in Hard Contact. She took initiative on her own and was so pleased with herself afterward; it was kinda cute.

Idea for a story : Instead of Etain dying to save the trooper, it was Skirata, for any reason. Doesn't really matter. Mostly Ordo and Etain, on-scene, having to deal with that, and then the associated, longer-term fallout. It probably wouldn't be about Etain, but the narrative could ride around on her shoulder while everything was happening, so it would be Etain-centric. The dynamics alone would be interesting.

Unpopular opinion : OKAY. This is nowhere near comprehensive, but: I no longer really think Etain tricked Darman into unprotected sex with the intent to get pregnant. I feel like there is reasonable evidence to suggest Darman and Etain were already having unprotected sex even before Etain came to her decision, no false pretenses required. And I mean, sure, even if they were, I definitely feel like her thinking about the possibility of pregnancy in the future should have at least prompted her to start a conversation before continuing to have unprotected sex with him, but that's still a far cry from the idea she actively sabotaged agreed-upon birth control measures. (Not even getting into the "but did they even have quality sex education" thing because that's straight up headcanon vs headcanon and that's a nightmare road.)

Favorite relationship : (Sorry, Darman, but) MEREEL. Etain and Mereel's friendship came out of left field, but I actually really, really liked it.

Favorite headcanon : That Etain's intersex. Possibly also trans or questioning.

Edited 2022-01-19 23:21 (UTC)

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